Babel:666

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the encyclopedia from hell that anyone can worship.
There are currently 37,242 souls in our warehouse.

Book of Occult · The Big Sixes · Horns of Pan · Kill Todd Lyons · Kroni · Greed

Murder · Damned Souls · Angra Mainyu

Today's featured satanist

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n the beginning there was nothing, and from that nothing arose Uncyclopedia, a great and magnificent tome containing all that was good. And once opened, Uncyclopedia spawned all that was funny and great. From the pages of Uncyclopedia sprang forth the knowledge of how to huff a cat, the knowledge of the meaning of the acronym "NRA", and the knowledge of how to beat a joke to death. From Uncyclopedia sprung Oscar Wilde quotes, beautiful pictures, and an annoying copycat named Wikipedia. However, right from the beginning, there was foretold an end. On the last page of Uncyclopedia, there is a small note. The note reads as follows:

Dear Reader, Uncyclopedia will not last forever. Eventually there will come the Unpocalypse: A fiery rain of Hebrews will fall from the sky, followed by forty days and nights of fog. Once the fog is lifted, Uncyclopedia will be no more. However, dearest Reader, take solace in the fact that you will have due warning. There will be 5 signs that the Unpocalypse is coming. The signs are as follows: (continued...)

Recently buried: Todd Lyons - Hindleyite - Suresh - Mhaille - DeathByPie - Hardwick Fundlebuggy

Did you kill...

  • ...Elvis?
  • ...JFK?
  • ...Jesus?
  • ...some Zombies?
  • ...Oscar Wilde?
  • ...Chuck Norris?

In the pit

On this day...

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May 14: Sky's the Limit Day, Fat Guys in Spandex Festival San Francisco, California USA.

  • 468 BCE - Sky colour declared blue by Greek philosophers.
  • 49 BCE - Sky declared grey by the Roman Republic in order to provoke the Greeks into a fight.
  • 1953 - Sky Masterson, a character from the musical Guys and Dolls, is played by Marlon Brando.
  • 1973 - Skylab, the United States' first space station, is launched. It will take a dozen Druids to keep it in orbit.
  • 1979 - Skylight, the glass thing in my goddamned roof, is greatly expanded by Skylab's wonderful return to Earth. Dammit.
  • 1981 - Demise of the International Dark-Sky Association.
  • 2005 - Skynet is founded by Marlon Brando, utilizing power module and microchips from a crashed Skylab, and broken glass from some guy's skylight.
  • 2006 - Marlon Brando dies in a skydiving accident.
  • 2007 - Bill Gates hits puberty.
  • 2009 - Prime Minister of Australia, Kevin Rudd, declares free money for all.
  • 2010 - Puberty sues Bill Gates for 'unbelievable infliction of emotional distress and disgusting zits'; asks $500 billion.
  • 2012 - Marlon Brando's remains explode, with debris landing as far away as Johannesburg, South Africa.
  • 2014 - The Moon sues Bill Gates because doing nothing but orbiting the earth constantly for billions of years is well and truly boring. It seeks all money on Earth or a PC to play on while orbiting.
  • 2525 - I lost my keys again :(
  • 2990 - Lost keys are located in Howard Beach at the social club of an Italian "Gentleman of Honor" who prefers to remain anonymous.

Today's featured picture

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Note to all world leaders: When the zombies show up, the Marxists are never far behind.

Image Credit: Zombiebaron
Dungeon - Democracy sucks

Portals to hell

Anti-Zionism (pictured) | Kevin McCarthy | Mike Johnson | House of Bourbon | Akaa, Finland | Nikki Haley | Menelaus | Ajax | Air Canada | Agamemnon | Great Schism | UnTunes:I'm Just Ten | Taylor Swift | Praey for the gods‎‎ | Henry Kissinger | Sandra Day O'Connor | Battle for Dream Island | Rastadon | Quintana Roo | Digestive system | The Sims 4 | Ahsoka (TV series) | King Charles II | The Man from U.N.C.L.E.‎‎ | Antimony | William Pitt the Elder | Tally Hall


More portals to hell | Most wanted brains | Requested assisinations | Make a stub | Orphans | Soul Review | Try sacrificing a...

Satanist and Imp of the Month

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Once again, dear chaps, the Devil wins this award. 13th month in a row. He's that good, you say. Well I say, chaps, that just because he runs this website doesn't mean you blokes have to keep voting for him! He's already got 13 bloody GUNs! Stop voting for ------------ *scream from off stage*.
Announcers body is seen hanged from a tree


Noobaward.jpg

The Devil, it seems, has done it again. Yet anouther award for him to hang above his desk, eh? I think he'll soon run out of space if he keeps up like this! He's already got 12 of these. Not that he doesn't deserve them and all. No no no deary, after seeing what happened to the last guy, I'd never say something like that. But really folks, have any of you even read the rules? He can only win once. It says it plane and clear. Well I say we fight it brothers! I say we kill The Beast! I say we
Announcer slumps forward in his chair. He has a large sword stuck in his back.


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