Portal:Society
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Society portal.
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Society only finds skinny people attractive, but is fat itself. Society doesn't like to stereotype people, except those damn Mexicans with their beans and rice. Society thinks foreigners should learn English before coming to America, but needs to find an English-speaker when it goes on vacation abroad. Society finds prison rape hilarious. Society believes America to be the greatest country on the motherfucking planet! Society preaches that gays should have equal rights... Just not in front of Society. Society knows that anyone who doesn't stand up during the Star-Spangled Banner is obviously a Communist. Society has no gender, yet seems to favor white, Christians . But trust us, Society's not biased or hypocritical at all.
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| A picture of the author, Henry Petty-Fitzmaurice, no doubt drawn in mid-'hot Japanese girls' fantasising. |
Hot Japanese Girls - Colourblind or Unable to Speak English? is a book written by Henry Charles Keith Petty-Fitzmaurice, 5th Marquess of Lansdowne, KG, GCSI, GCMG, GCIE, PC, upon his return from the land of the 'Rising Sun' in the summer of 1906, where he had represented Great Britain at the signing of the Anglo-Japanese Alliance Treaty, despite having no knowledge of the Japanese culture whatsoever. The book brought controversy to both home and abroad (Japan anyway), as it lead to the abrupt end of the treaty, and worse, Petty-Fitzmaurice's promising career in writing, not to mention his marriage.
The book discusses, as the title suggests, whether attractive Japanese women are colourblind or just can't speak English at all - a question wholesomely inspired by a meeting with a Japanese female with a particularly confusing item of clothing: a powder blue top with the words "I ♥ Pink" on the front....
| Archive | Article credit: Nachlader | (more...) |
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You know what they say, "You can't shit a shitter". But M.C. Escher will be damned if he didn't try!
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Society in the News
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| Cockpunching will not be featured. However, if you are interested, this is how you would do it. |
NEW YORK, NY -- Today, Central Park Zoo in New York City announced that it would be abandoning the concept of the "petting zoo" and replacing it with a new "punching zoo," in which small children will be allowed to punch, and otherwise abuse, small animals.
The move will likely revolutionize the petting zoo business, which has been steadily declining in recent years. The CEO of central park zoo, T.J. Abram, explains, "Nobody really cared about petting zoos anymore. I mean, seriously, why would any child want to be gentle and loving to a small animal?...
| Archive | Article credit: THE | (more...) |
Quote of the Week
“Don't worry if she calls the cops, she's just trying to get you jealous.”
- ~ From the article: HowTo:Make girls like you
Did you know...
- ...that necromancy is just another way of getting a date, and that you shouldn't judge me?
- ...that petting zoos are gonna get a whole lot more fun?
- ...that letting other people do it is
- ...that every single person is unique, except you?
- ...that circular logic is good because I read it in an article on circular logic?
- ...that necromancy is just another way of getting a date, and that you shouldn't judge me?
- ...that walking is like running very slowly?
- ...that bad arguments are just as good as good ones? Because I said so?
| ...Add to the list | (more...) |
Recent Articles in Society
HowTo:Write Colin Meloy Lyrics | Black sheep | Shit A Shitter Paradox | UnTunes:The Online Stalker Call from Grandma | Alternative Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous | Why?:You shouldn't take acid before riding a bicycle | High school: an essay by an old lonely man in a retirement home | Why?:Fight Club is a cop out? | Bad Directions | An Open Letter to the Cheese Growing in Between My Toes | Nursery | Tapheselachophobia | Let Someone Else Do It | Blacking Up | Dear Diary
Topics in Society
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